When I arrived in Buenos Aires I told you that I wished the taxi ride would take forever because as long as I was in the taxi, I didn't have to face the unknown ahead of me. I imagine when I take the taxi to the airport today I will also be wishing that the taxi ride will take forever because when it arrives at the airport, it means my time in South America is over. I'm so ready to come home and at the same time I'm not ready at all. Sometimes I feel like I need more time.
I can't explain to you how I feel right now. It's not a good feeling. One theme for me here has been the idea of temporary relationships. I already knew this but it has been confirmed that I crave long term, deep relationships. It has been so fun meeting new people. I haven't held anything back with them. I have given myself (and in so doing I have learned more how to be myself). The drawback is that usually the outcome is having to let them go eventually. Sometimes after a day, sometimes after a week and sometimes after 5 weeks. There have been a few people that it really hurts to let go. I wouldn't trade it, but....
Another theme was language. I am proud to say that I spent my last night in Chile with a Chilean family with whom I spoke Spanish for over 5 hours. One more way my world has opened. I feel so thankful to speak this language, even at the broken level that I am still speaking it. Its such an amazing feeling. Mis amigos (gringos o latinos) que hablan español, espero que vayan a hablar conmigo en español!!
Living in a different country always changes you. I experienced it in the Czech Republic and I have definitely experienced it here. It isn´t always mind blowing or instantaneous. The changes may be visible to others or not, but they are there. I thank all the people who bought me journals and encouraged me to blog. Both outlets have helped me to process what I have experienced here. As I sat on the beach yesterday contemplating, my mind whirled with all the experiences and all the thoughts and feelings and desires for the future and all the realizations I have made. Even though Im going back to my same physical location, I really hope I don't go back to same place I was before. There is a better place waiting for me when I get back.
On my way now to have one last lunch with friends that I met in Buenos Aires. Lots of lasts in the last few days. I'm thankful for the lasts because it means there were firsts!
Besos and abrazos to all those I met along the way and have to leave behind. I really do hope to see some of you again! And to my long termers, see you stateside!! (I will be expecting kisses from you all. Thats the South American way!! One good thing we could learn from them.)
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Gringos, Americanization and Paying it Forward
Growing up in Arizona, being called a gringa was somewhat of an insult coming from the mouths of Mexican school children on the playground. So you can imagine my discomfort at being called a gringa here. (Did I talk about this in a previous blog? Days are running together) However, I have been reassured that it means nothing derogatory here. Its just an adjectives for people from the United States (Estadounidence is quite a mouthful to get out when you are talking about people. It really is much easier to say gringo or gringa). I even saw a sign for an American style sandwich it was called Lomito Gringo or something like that.
Jaime, who I told you about before, the slave driver as his girl friend and I like to call him (aprovecha Kelly! Take advadange of your time here!), invited me (pushed me, but thanks for that Jaime) to come to Santiago, which I did. It was so amazing. I spent the entire weekend speaking in Spanish with him and his girlfriend (who is American, and would you believe it, it was way easier to speak Spanish with her!) and exploring the city of Santiago. If you go to Santiago, in much of the urban areas you can't even tell that you are in South America (or at least the image that most of us picture when we think of South America, which Valparaiso fits perfectly with its corregated steel and colorful walls). It also might be the cleanest and most peaceful extremely large city I have ever seen. Thats not really the Americanization of South America that I am referring to in the title though. It really was on the outskirts of Viña del Mar where they are starting to build cookie cutter suburban houses. Its such a shame. The character is completely lost. To be honest though, they do look much more comfortable to live in than the corregated shacks. Come on Viña, at least paint them different colors.
So I said I had to pay forward what Jaime did for me and my opportunity came quicker than I imagined. This weekend, hours before I had to depart for Santiago I discovered that my host family was going to be almost double for the last week what it had been. I scrambled to find a hostel right before I left and here I am at Che Lagarto hostel in Viña del Mar. Well, the first night I met a bunch of really cool people. One is Michael from New Zealand, who yes, has an awesome accent which I like to copy from time to time. I offered to go to Valparaiso with him since he hadnt been. He was a stitch to be around and I pretty much couldnt stop laughing the whole time. We had the best ice cream and coffees ever and we decided I deserved an award for being the best tour guide ever. Two other guys are the 18 year old Canadians who were gonna leave Chile without going to Valpo! I told them I would take them if they wanted and they immediately said yes. (They had been sitting around the hostel a lot). They were a kick too, and gave me a little ego boost by flirting with me. And they made me laugh with their poop jokes and other typical 18 year old vulgarities. Fun times.
6 more days. Hard to believe. Not sure how I feel, but I am looking forward to coming home.
Besos
Jaime, who I told you about before, the slave driver as his girl friend and I like to call him (aprovecha Kelly! Take advadange of your time here!), invited me (pushed me, but thanks for that Jaime) to come to Santiago, which I did. It was so amazing. I spent the entire weekend speaking in Spanish with him and his girlfriend (who is American, and would you believe it, it was way easier to speak Spanish with her!) and exploring the city of Santiago. If you go to Santiago, in much of the urban areas you can't even tell that you are in South America (or at least the image that most of us picture when we think of South America, which Valparaiso fits perfectly with its corregated steel and colorful walls). It also might be the cleanest and most peaceful extremely large city I have ever seen. Thats not really the Americanization of South America that I am referring to in the title though. It really was on the outskirts of Viña del Mar where they are starting to build cookie cutter suburban houses. Its such a shame. The character is completely lost. To be honest though, they do look much more comfortable to live in than the corregated shacks. Come on Viña, at least paint them different colors.
So I said I had to pay forward what Jaime did for me and my opportunity came quicker than I imagined. This weekend, hours before I had to depart for Santiago I discovered that my host family was going to be almost double for the last week what it had been. I scrambled to find a hostel right before I left and here I am at Che Lagarto hostel in Viña del Mar. Well, the first night I met a bunch of really cool people. One is Michael from New Zealand, who yes, has an awesome accent which I like to copy from time to time. I offered to go to Valparaiso with him since he hadnt been. He was a stitch to be around and I pretty much couldnt stop laughing the whole time. We had the best ice cream and coffees ever and we decided I deserved an award for being the best tour guide ever. Two other guys are the 18 year old Canadians who were gonna leave Chile without going to Valpo! I told them I would take them if they wanted and they immediately said yes. (They had been sitting around the hostel a lot). They were a kick too, and gave me a little ego boost by flirting with me. And they made me laugh with their poop jokes and other typical 18 year old vulgarities. Fun times.
6 more days. Hard to believe. Not sure how I feel, but I am looking forward to coming home.
Besos
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